Sometimes His Answer is “No”
Judy F., info@aascv.org
Bill W. said of acceptance, “essentially this is to ask for the resources of grace by which we may make spiritual progress under all conditions. Greatly emphasized in the “Serenity Prayer” is a need for the kind of wisdom that discriminates between the possible and the impossible. We shall also see that life’s formidable array of pains and problems will require many different degrees of acceptance as we try to apply this valued principle.”
I had a sponsor who used to tell me to read page 469 (now it is page 417) in the Big Book on acceptance. We would go back and forth on the true meaning of “acceptance” because I thought it was giving GOD permission to just “pour it” on me and it was ok with me. I had no concept of that white flag and the word surrender. Only weak people gave up.
Over the years I have had many opportunities to work on this “acceptance” idea. As it states in the book, “acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation— some fact of my life— unacceptable to me.” Today I am learning how to pray for GOD’s will for me and then I ask for the power to carry that out.
Probably the hardest answer is when HE says no! Is this that “loving God” who just said no to me? I’m sure my head spins around several times and my eyes bulge out and that defiant little two year old throws the biggest temper tantrum. Thanks to my friends who said the miracle was I heard the “no” – it would be then up to me whether I paid attention to it.
My peace comes in the “pause” to listen for the answer. I’m learning, why bother to do all that prayer and meditation if I’m not going to take the time to listen as well? After all, isn’t that what Step Eleven is all about – “Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood him. Praying only for the knowledge of HIS will for us and the power to carry that out.”
My recent experience in not fighting God’s no was when I was trying to get on a flight to Memphis for the ICOAA Conference (central office conference). My reservation had me leaving at 7:00am on Thursday but the plane had been hit by lightning the day before and they were having mechanical problems. The flight was delayed till 2:00pm. The airlines then put me on a flight at 12:30pm out of a different airport. When checking in for that flight it was also delayed due to mechanical problems. The delay would cause me to miss my new connection in Atlanta. Their solution was to put me on a morning flight out of LAX, arriving in Memphis in the late afternoon on Friday. Now I have missed one day of a two day conference – I hear you God. The real acceptance came when I called to cancel my hotel and they only had me registered for one night not three. Listen! Pause! “And acceptance is the answer to all my problems.”